Harry Potter and the Backwards Glance
by krystal-phyre
Summary: Harry Potter has something to learn. I promise lots of strange things will happen and you will be surprised. This will not be like anything else you've read. As always these are borrowed characters and I don't own anything except my story. Please readrevi
1. Backwards Glance

Dumbledore walked with Harry into the Great Hall for dinner. He stopped at the Gryffindor table and spoke to the chattering group of seventh year boys at the end of the table nearest the door. He smiled warmly, "This is my guest, Harry Underwood, he will be staying with you in Gryffindor Tower. I am certain you will enjoy his visit." Dumbledore went to the staff table and Harry sat down between the young Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. He couldn't help but stare at the boy across the table from him. Remus broke Harry's concentration by reaching out his hand. "Hello, I'm Remus Lupin. Are you a relative of Dumbledore's?"

Harry shook his hand, "Yes, you could say that." He went on and was introduced to Sirius Black, James Potter, and Peter Pettigrew. When he was introduced to Lily Evans he could barely speak, but her eyes comforted and calmed him without even trying so he was able to manage a casual "hello". It was great to be with all of them, but he couldn't imagine learning anything important this way.

After dinner was over he went to visit Dumbledore once again. He was finally starting to grasp the magnitude of his circumstances and beginning to wonder why he was here and when he would return to his own time. Dumbledore was no help, so, Harry thought of another question, "Will anyone remember me?"

Dumbledore shook his head, "No, you aren't meant to be here. You will be remembered as a figment only. They won't see you in their memories because you are only passing briefly through this time."

Harry wasn't sure how this made him feel. He knew it would be awkward possibly even dangerous if anyone remembered him, it was for the best.

That night he laid awake on his cot pretending to sleep, while Padfoot, Prongs, and Wormtail discussed their plans for the upcoming weekend.

"It's not every month we get to act like ourselves all weekend," laughed Padfoot.

"I know," said Prongs. "I love having full moon on weekends."

Mooney was finally joining this conversation, "Shut up! Just shut up! It's not like I choose to play werewolf every month. Unlike you blokes, I don't get to keep my mind."

Prong decided to lighten this mood, as he usually did when his friend was out of sorts the night before a full moon, "Mooney, or should I say Moody, you are becoming just like a bloody woman at her time of the month. Next thing you know, we'll have to go out and buy you a whole pack of these." Harry half opened his eyes just in time to see the flannel sanitary pad James had nicked from a trunk in the girls dorm fly through the air and land on Mooney's bed. Wormtail was laughing almost hysterically. Mooney rose to his full height, which was well over 6 feet, and walked over to Prongs, threw the pad back at him and said, "I don't find that funny. You'd best return that to its owner and leave me to rest." Harry rolled over so they couldn't see him smile, not that anyone was paying attention.

The following morning Harry awoke to find all the Marauders already gone. He decided that since he couldn't follow his father on his exploits this weekend, maybe he could learn something from his mother. It might look suspicious to follow her around so he went to James' trunk and used a spell to open it, in the hopes that he had left the invisibility cloak. Luck was finally on his side, because it was there.

He found her leaving the Gryffindor common room and after dropping off a pile of books to the library, she headed down to the dungeon. Harry wondered what she could be doing and kept close on her tail, careful not to make a sound. She stopped and went down a dark corridor just ahead of the Slytherin common room. A dark figure scooped her up and gave her a kiss. Lily shoved him hard away from her and said, "No, not now Severus!" Harry's heart was pounding as watched a young Severus Snape tidying his robes and looking oddly at Lily. She looked angrily at him and her words cut into him like the blades of a dagger, "Severus, I came only to hear your decision. It's me or Voldemort. What's it going to be?"

Severus spoke through gritted teeth, "I have asked you not to speak the Dark Lord's name."

Lily still looking as if she might haul off and hit him at any moment, scoffed at him, "I'm a Mudblood remember? I don't know any better."

Severus softened slightly, "Lily, you know I never meant that. It's just that there were Slytherins around; I had to keep up appearances or I would have been facing hexes from my entire house. I love you despite the fact that you are Muggle born, but no one in my house would even remotely understand."

Lily spoke in a quieter tone, "Then you are leaving it behind?"

Severus turned around as not to face her, "I want to, but I'm in too deep. You don't just walk away from the Dark Lord."

Lily's eyes welled up with tears, "Fine, if you won't do it for me will do it for our child?"

Severus turned around, "Oh, Lily, you're…"

Lily nodded, "Yes, I'm pregnant. I just found out a few days ago."

Severus got down on one knee and took her hand, "Lily, will you marry me?"

Lily's tears streamed down her face, hitting the floor, "Are you finished with the Dark Arts?"

Severus hung his head, "I just can't. It's part of who I am now."

Lily broke away from him and said her final words to him, "Then I am going to marry James. He is my boyfriend so I suppose he'll be wanting to. Being the noble man that he is, he will not divorce me when he finds out I'm pregnant with someone else's child."

Severus now had tears down his cheek, "Lily, you don't have to do that. I can give you everything you've ever wanted."

Lily stepped back, "No, I will not have my child grow up to be evil. I will not be married to a Death Eater." With that she stormed away.

Harry knew he had just found out what he needed to learn. His biological father was not James Potter. The man who had been horrible to him all this time, Severus Snape, was his father.

_No. It can't be. Maybe it was a mistake. He looked like James Potter and nothing like Severus Snape. Maybe his mother was wrong. Maybe she checked the dates later and found that James Potter fathered her child._

Now, he must go back to his own time. There was someone there who could answer his questions about what he had just seen. The flights of stairs flew beneath his feet as he ran to the North Tower. He knocked on the office door, hoping there would be a Seer there who could tell him how to go back. There was no answer. He held out his wand and said, "Alohamora," and the door came unlatched. He went to the couch and lay down, scooting around hoping to find the right spot. Tiredness overtook him and he fell asleep. When he awoke, Professor Trelawney was standing over him. He almost jumped off the couch in his hurry to get off it. Professor Trelawney's brown eyes, which were magnified by her glasses to look abnormally large, were staring at him, "Have a good sleep, dear boy?"

Harry nodded, "Yes, thank you. How long have I been asleep?"

Professor Trelawney replied, "Oh, you've been here all night. It's about 9 am, Saturday morning."

_Had it all been a dream? It had felt so real._

Trelawney interrupted the thoughts he was trying to make sense of, "Do you still have a need to see the future?"

Harry shook his head. "Right now I'm more concerned with my past."

Trelawney spoke again in her strange mystic voice, "I thought as much. With your past, dear boy, I cannot help you. I feel there is someone else who can answer all your questions."

Harry knew who she meant as much as he'd rather not. He thanked her and left quickly.

It was time to visit the dungeon again. He had been to Snape's office in his fifth year so he knew exactly where he was going. He found the door and knocked lightly. A sneering voice yelled "Come in". He stepped inside and Professor Snape looked up from the pile of papers he was grading, "Yes, Potter, what is it?"

"You knew my mother."

"Yes, Potter, she was in my year at school and for some reason, felt sorry for me. Is there a destination for this rather annoying trip down memory lane?"

"So, you weren't close with her?"

"My relationship with your mother is none of your business."

Harry thought he should have realized the direct approach was the only way to deal with Snape, "It is my business, especially, if you could be my father!"

Snape finally dropped his quill and stood up eyes set on Harry, "What would make you think that? Is there some part of me she hadn't charmed out of you?"

Harry stood shocked. It was true then. He was the child of Severus Snape, but this made no sense. "What do you mean a part of you she hasn't charmed out of me?"

Snape's eyes were fixated, "No, you enlighten me first. What do you know?"

Harry stammered, "It can't be. It was just a dream I had while sleeping on Trelawney's old couch."

Snape's eyes widened, "What did you see in this dream?"

Harry said, "I saw you. You kissed my mother. She told you she was pregnant, with your child."

Snape was loosing his composure slowly, but surely. He spoke with a little bit of trembling in his voice, "I have done many things I am not proud of, but that was the worst. I died that day, when I lost Lily."

Harry was in sheer disbelief, "I could still belong to James couldn't I?

Snape paced, in nervous contemplation, as he spoke, "She started dating him in our seventh year because people were becoming very suspicious of her constant attempts to protect me from James. I think he knew along, but he wanted her so much that he didn't care that she only wanted me."

Harry still wondered, "Still, you must admit I look nothing like you."

Snape laughed his sneering laugh, "I thought you would have learned by now."

"Learned what?" Harry questioned.

"That with magic, anything is possible." Snape said. "Your mother was very gifted with charms. An appearance charm done at birth is irreversible, even with the strongest magic. Your nose, your chin, or any facial feature could have been modified."

"Even my hair?" Harry wondered aloud.

Snape laughed, "No, that would not have had to be changed. I have to use so much smoothing potion to make my hair lie straight it makes my hair look greasy. I much prefer it this way though."

Harry went on with his questions, "You don't even wear glasses."

Snape looked at him, "I did until after my first year here when I got tired of them being broken. I now wear the wizard's equivalent of contact lenses."

Harry was surprised. Snape had never spoken to him like this and Harry wondered why, "Why have you been so cruel to me all these years?"

Snape answered, "I wanted to make you stronger. You seemed to fear nothing, but, fear can be a very important thing. Also, if you were afraid of me, I thought you'd never come asking questions. Apparently, I was mistaken."

Harry went cold. He had spent all those years with the Dursleys for nothing. "Why did you just leave me with the Dursleys?"

Snape looked at him with a hint of sorow rolling through his black eyes, "James was named your father, so legally I had no rights to you. The Dark Lord would have come looking for you. You were safer away from the wizarding world."

Harry was starting to put the pieces of his story together. His father had been there all along. A part of him always felt that connection between himself and Snape. Finally it came to him. He knew his career path. "I've been so confused, but now I know what I want to do after I finish school."

Snape didn't know whether to smile, cry, or throw things. His son finally knew him. There was no making up for they had lost, but now there was hope, something he hadn't known since Lily had left him. So, he spoke as a father now, "Yes, tell me what is you want to do after you finish school."

Harry replied, "I still want to become an Auror, but I don't want to wait until someone ruins lives before I intervene. I want to counsel those in danger of turning to the Dark Arts. You are head of Slytherin, therefore, you would know who really needs help. I know I'd never be able to stop everyone, but I want to give second chances like Dumbledore did for you."

Snape laughed once again, "Spoken like a true Gryffindor. If that is your wish, I will help you. If you can save one person from my fate, it will be worth it."

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	2. lesson learned

Dumbledore walked with Harry into the Great Hall for dinner. He stopped at the Gryffindor table and spoke to the chattering group of seventh year boys at the end of the table nearest the door. He smiled warmly. "This is my guest, Harry Underwood, he will be staying with you in Gryffindor Tower. I am certain you will enjoy his visit." Dumbledore went on to the staff table and Harry sat down between the young Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. He couldn't help but stare at the boy across the table from him. Remus broke his concentration by reaching out his hand. "Hello, I'm Remus Lupin. Are you a relative of Dumbledore's?"

Harry shook his hand. "Yes, you could say that." He went on and was introduced to Sirius Black, James Potter, and Peter Pettigrew. When he was introduced to Lily Evans he could barely speak, but her eyes comforted and calmed him without even trying so he was able to manage a casual, "hello". It was great to be with them all, but he couldn't imagine learning anything important this way.

After dinner was over he went to visit Dumbledore once again. He was finally grasping the magnitude of his circumstances and wondering why he was here and when he would return to his own time. Dumbledore was no help so Harry thought of another question. "Will anyone remember me?"

Dumbledore shook his head. "No, you aren't meant to be here. You will be remembered as a figment only."

Harry wasn't sure how this made him feel. He knew it would be awkward possibly even dangerous if anyone remembered him so it was for the best.

That night he laid awake on his cot pretending to sleep while Padfoot, Prongs, and Wormtail discussed their plans for the weekend.

"It's not every month we get to act like ourselves all weekend." laughed Padfoot.

"I know." said Prongs, "I love having full moon on weekends."

Mooney was finally joining this conversation. "Shut up! Just shut up! It's not like I choose to play werewolf every month. Unlike you guys I don't get to keep my mind."

Prong decided to lighten this mood as he usually did when his friend was out of sorts the night before a full moon. "Mooney, or should I say Moody, you are becoming just like a bloody woman at her time of the month. Next thing you know we'll have to go out and buy you a whole pack of these." Harry half opened his eyes just in time to see the flannel sanitary pad James had nicked from a trunk in the girls dorm fly through the air and land on Mooney's bed. Wormtail was laughing almost hysterically. Mooney rose to his full height which was well over 6 feet and walked over to Prongs threw the pad back at him and said, "I don't find that funny. You'd best return this to it's owner and leave me to rest." Harry rolled over so they couldn't see him smile, not that anyone was paying attention.

The following morning Harry awoke to find all the Marauders already gone. He decided that since he couldn't follow his father on his exploits this weekend maybe he could learn something from his mother. It might look suspicious to follow her around so he went to James' trunk and used a spell to open it in the hopes that he had left the invisibility cloak. Luck was finally on his because there it was.

He found her leaving the Ravenclaw common room and after dropping off a pile of books at the library she headed down to the dungeon. Harry wondered what she could be doing and kept close on her tail careful not to make a sound. She stopped and went down a dark corridor just ahead of the Slytherin common room. A dark figure scooped her up and gave her a kiss. Lily shoved him hard away from her and said, "No, not now Severus!" Harry's heart was pounding as watched a young Severus Snape tidying his robes and looking oddly at Lily. She looked angrily at him and spoke like she was trying to shoot daggers at him. "Severus, I came only to hear your decision. It's me or Voldemort. What's it going to be?"

Severus spoke through gritted teeth. "I have asked you not to speak the Dark Lord's name."

Lily still looking as if she might haul off and hit him at any moment scoffed at him. "I'm a Mudblood remember. I don't know any better."

Severus softened slightly. "Lily, you know I never meant that. It's just that there were Slytherins around. I had to keep up appearances or I would have been facing hexes from my whole house. I love you despite the fact that you are Muggle born, but no one in my house would even remotely understand."

Lily spoke in a quieter tone. "Then you are leaving it behind."

Severus turned around as not to face her. "I want to, but I'm in too deep. You don't just walk away from the Dark Lord."

Lily's eyes welled up with tears. "Fine, if you won't do it for me will do it for our child?"

Severus turned around. "Oh, Lily, you're…"

Lily nodded. "Yes, I'm pregnant. I just found out a few days ago."

Severus got down on one knee and took her hand. "Lily, will you marry me?"

Lily's tears streamed down hitting the floor. "Are you finished with the Dark Arts?"

Severus hung his head. "I just can't. It's part of who I am now."

Lily broke away from him and said her final words to him. "Then I am going to marry James. He is my boyfriend so I suppose he'll be wanting to. Being the noble man that he is he will not divorce me when he finds out I'm pregnant with someone else's child."

Severus now had tears down his cheek. "Lily, you don't have to do that. I can give you everything you've ever wanted."

Lily stepped back. "No, I will not have my child grow up to be evil. I will not be married to a Death Eater." With that she stormed away.

Harry knew he had just found out what he needed to learn. His biological father was not James Potter. The man who had been horrible to him all this time, Severus Snape, was his father. No, it can't be. Maybe it was a mistake. He looked like James Potter and nothing like Severus Snape. Maybe his mother was wrong and checked her dates later and found that it had been James Potter who fathered her child.

Now he could go back to his own time. There was someone there who could answer his questions about what he just saw. The flights of stairs flew beneath his feet as he ran to the North Tower. He knocked on the office door hoping there would be a Seer there who could tell him how to go back. There was no answer. He held out his wand and said, "Alohamora" and the door came unlatched. He went to the couch and laid down, scooting around hoping to find the right spot. Tiredness overtook him and he fell asleep. When he awoke Professor Trelawney was standing over him. He almost jumped off the couch in his hurry to get off it. Professor Trelawney's brown eyes which were magnified by her glasses to look abnormally large were staring at him. "Have a good sleep, dear boy?"

Harry nodded. "Yes, thank you. How long have I been asleep?"

Professor Trelawney replied, "Oh, you've been here all night. It's about 9 am Saturday morning."

_Had it all been a dream? It had felt so real._

Trelawney interrupted the thoughts he was trying to make sense of. "Do you still have a need to see the future?"

Harry shook his head, "Right now I'm more concerned with my past."

Trelawney spoke again in her strangely mystic voice. "I thought as much. With your past, dear boy, I cannot help you. I feel there is someone else who can answer all your questions."

Harry knew who she meant as much as he'd rather not. He thanked her and left quickly.

It was time to visit the dungeon again. He had been to Snape's office in his fifth year so he knew exactly where he was going. He found the door and knocked lightly. A sneering voice yelled, "Come in". He stepped inside and Professor Snape looked up from the pile of papers he was grading. "Yes, Potter, what is it?"

"You knew my mother."

"Yes, Potter, she was in my year at school and for some reason felt sorry for me. Is there a destination for this rather annoying trip down memory lane."

"So you weren't close with her?"

"My relationship with your mother is none of your business."

Harry thought he should have realized the direct approach was the only way to deal with Snape. "It is my business if you could possibly be my father!"

Snape finally dropped his quill and stood up eyes set on Harry. "What would make you think that? Is there some part of me she hasn't charmed out of you?"

Harry stood shocked. It was true then. He was the child of Severus Snape, but this made no sense. "What do you mean a part of you she hasn't charmed out of me?"

Snape's eyes were fixated. "No, you enlighten me first. What do you know?"

Harry stammered, "It can't be. It was just a dream I had while sleeping on Trelawney's old couch."

Snape's eyes widened. "What did you see in this dream?"

Harry said, "I saw you. You kissed my mother. She told you she was pregnant with your child."

Snape was loosing his composure slowly, but surely. He spoke with a little bit of trembling in his voice. "I have done many things I am not proud of, but that was the worst. I died that day I lost Lily."

Harry was in sheer disbelief. "I could still have belonged to James couldn't I?

Snape paced in nervous contemplation as he spoke. "She started dating him in our seventh year because people were becoming very suspicious of her constant attempts to protect me from James. I think he knew all along, but he wanted her so much he didn't care that she only wanted me."

Harry still wondered. "Still, you must admit I look nothing like you."

Snape laughed his sneering laugh. "I thought you would have learned by now."

"Learned what?" Harry questioned.

"That with magic anything is possible." Snape said. "Your mother was very gifted with charms. An appearance charm done at birth is irreversible even with the strongest magic. Your nose, your chin, or any facial feature could have been modified."

"Even my hair?" Harry wondered aloud.

Snape laughed, "No, that would not have had to be changed. I have to use so much smoothing potion to make my hair lie straight it makes my hair look greasy. I much prefer it this way though."

Harry went on with his questions. "You don't even wear glasses."

Snape told him in a quieter tone, "I did until after my first year here when I got tired of them being broken. I now wear the wizard's equivalent of contact lenses."

Harry was surprised. Snape had never spoken to him like this and Harry wondered _why_. "Why have you been so cruel to me all these years."

Snape answered, "I wanted to make you stronger. You seemed to fear nothing and fear can be a very useful thing. Also if you were afraid of me I thought you'd never come asking questions. Apparently I was mistaken."

Harry went cold. He had spent all those years with the Dursleys for nothing. "Why did you just leave me with the Dursleys?"

Snape looked at him with a hint of sorrow rolling through his black eyes. "James was named your father so legally I had no rights to you. The Dark Lord would have come looking for you. You were safer away from the wizarding world."

Harry was starting to put the pieces of his story together. His father had been there all along. A part of him had always felt that connection between himself and Snape, and now it made sense. Finally it came to him. He knew his career path. "I've been so confused, but now I know what I want to do after I finish school ."

Snape didn't know whether to laugh, cry, or throw things. His son finally knew him. There was no making up for all they had lost, but now there was hope, something he hadn't know since Lily had left him. So he spoke as a father now, "Yes, tell me what is you want to do after you finish school."

Harry replied, "I still want to become an Auror, but I don't want to wait till someone ruins lives before I intervene. I want to counsel those in danger of turning to the Dark Arts. You are head of Slytherin so you would know who really needs help. I know I'd never be able to stop everyone, but I want to give second chances like Dumbledore did for you."

Snape laughed once again, "Spoken like a Gryffindor. If that is your wish I will help you. If you can save one person from my fate it will be worth it."

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